Picture the scene, you’ve checked in. You may be a spy, in town clandestinely to meet a contact, or kill some guy with a poisoned machete. You may be a married couple, yearning for the anonymous touch of hotel sheets, hoping like hell your husband/wife don’t find out. You may even be a weary business traveller, looking only for an acceptable burger, ten minutes of free adult entertainment and a shockingly expensive Toblerone.
Hotels can cater for and accommodate all of these requirements. They provide a necessary service. A home away from home. A meeting point for strangers and a conference room for a party of conspiracy theorists, convinced that the banking cartels and high level networks of politicians, influencers and key families are secretly controlling the world, focusing sinister plans for depopulation and the creation of a world slave state. Then karaoke.
Yet some hotels have far more to contend with than rowdy 40th birthday parties and a party of dental hygienists from West Yorks demanding proper tea. Some hotels have fiendish owners who are secretly trying to dismantle them to cash in on the insurance. Some hotels are in high risk areas where the birds are armed, yeti roam freely and the very fabric of the establishment is under constant threat.
So it is in Bad Hotel. Lucky Frame’s astonishing attack on Western capitalism, the fiction of humane servitude and the militarisation of wildlife through advanced research programmes – all of which is funded by the aforementioned global elite and new world order.
The game itself is a delight. Simple to pick up, fun to play and smashing on the ears. Players must:
1. Build Hotel.
2. Make Music.
3. Stop Tadstock.
Bad Hotel is an insane hybrid of a tower defence game and a procedural music toy with tons of bullets (and healthy number of Wu-Tang references and credit crunch satire).
It’s probably best explained with a video. Try this…
The game has already picked up more love than a domestic engineer in a particularly slovenly Las Vegas wedding chapel. It’s won a BAFTA for goodness sake. A BAFTA! It’s got fans across the media and it’s attracted quotes like:
- “I like Bad Hotel so much I’d buy it for you. Get it. It’s wonderful” (Kotaku)
- “the stuff of wonderful nightmares…” (modojo)
- “Ladies and gentlemen, Bad Hotel is like being broken out of jail by a car full of clowns. Peculiar, scary, exciting and accompanied by many strange noises. You need this game.” (Scottish Games Network)
Bad Hotel is on Steam. It is worth both your time and your money. It is a mere $4.99 but is currently ON SALE for a piffling $3.99. At the risk of repeating ourselves, it’s really very good. Buy it and help defeat the bankers, the global elite and fight the new world order, the disgusting prices in hotel mini bars and weaponising the yeti.